Stargazing
by Zhie
Summary: AUSilm Two young brothers gaze up at the stars, wondering about their parents and their futures.


The twin elflings relaxed in the cool springtime grass, the soft new blades creating a natural bed that they easily could have fallen asleep on. Lazily they watched for shooting stars and nightbirds to fly by, but most of all, they waited for the few clouds that had yet to disperse to do so. It was an evening ritual they observed, even in the colder months, when they wrapped themselves in thick capes and even sometimes caught a cold from staying outside so long.

They never missed a night, not even in the snow, or the rain, or when the fog was so thick that barely the moon could be seen above. Tonight, the mist of clouds dissipated, revealing to them the clear night sky. Stars were sprinkled across the vast expanse of darkness, and it was the younger brother who pointed up first.

"It's that one," Elrond said. He squinted as he withdrew his hand, and then frowned. "I think."

"No, it's not bright enough," declared the elder peredhel, and Elros scanned the tiny points of shimmering light carefully. "That is North, that is West," he pointed out thrusting his arm in the directions as he made his explanation, nearly bopping Elrond's nose in the process of showing him which way West was. "He can't be there, either," he said, waving his hand around the southeastern area of the sky, "because he never is."

Elrond settled his head in the grass, content to leave his brother to find what they were looking for. His eyelids were drooping by the time he heard, "I found it! I found it! There he is!" Elros was happily pointing up at a bright light above, that to many others would have seemed an ordinary star. Turning his head to address his slightly younger brother, he said, "Look, he's winking at us!"

The light in the sky flashed twice more, and Elrond looked up in awe as Elros grinned and giggled. "Nana must be up there with him tonight, he usually only winks once. I think the other one is from her."

In matched voices, the twins called up to the sky, "Love you, Nana! Love you, Ada!" The star blinked again, but slower and more lovingly at the pair of elflings in the grass.

For a little while they watched the sky darken and the stars shine more brightly as their bedtime slowly approached. Their 'Uncle Maglor' as they called the elf who was their surrogate father had yet to call them to bed, and likely he had been persuaded to sing another tune before the adults retired as well. Whatever the reason, the youngsters were glad for this extra time, however brief, to think quietly to themselves under the watchful eyes of their parents far above in the heavens.

"El, can I ask you something?" Elros turned onto his side, and Elrond mimicked his action, so that the two mirrored each other. "El, I was thinking about what Uncle Maglor said. About us and our choices."

Elrond nodded slowly. He and his brother had been told that they had many opportunities to take advantage of. Although they were schooled modestly, they were mostly given leave to do as they pleased, and together had explored here and there and played games to amuse themselves. As they grew older, Uncle Maglor had suggested further tutelage, and while the twins had decided to learn the language of the menfolk in tribute to their herritage, they still continued to spend most of their time doing things of a more creative or recreational manner. "I was thinking about asking the potter if I could learn his craft," Elrond finally said. "I like to watch them make the big pots, the ones that are so big we could sit in one! El, if we could make pots and bowls and things, we would be useful when we grow up and we would have so much fun, too. They always get good and dirty when they make clay stuff," he said with some excitement, hoping perhaps his brother liked this idea, too. "And when we get to the West, we can make them for Ada and Nana, because they probably need them on their sky ship. Only, they would be ones we would make, so they would be even better than the rest they would have."

Elros smiled and nodded, but it was a sad sort of smile. "Sure, El. That sounds like fun."

Elrond's smile dropped immediately from his lips. "What's wrong, El?" he asked, reaching out and taking hold of his twin's hand. "El, tell me, I upset you, but how?"

"El, what if..." Elros squeezed Elrond's hand and then said, "What if I don't ever go to the West?"

The reaction was immediate. Elrond pulled away his hand as if he had been burned, and rolled to the other side with his arms wrapped protectively around his chest. "I wanchu to be'an'elf," he pouted, furrowing his brow.

"El." Elros poked the shoulder that was up in the air a few times. "El," he said with more force, but he instead placed his hand to rest gently on Elrond's shoulder. "El, I might."

"No, you won't," came the slightly growly reply. "Nana left'an Ada left'an you're gonna leave'n I'll be all'lone," he said, his voice tapering off to a whisper. "I don'wanna be alone, I'm just'a little guy," he said, using a phrase Uncle Maglor had made popular in reference to either of the brothers.

"How come you're so sure you wanna be an elf?" prodded Elros.

"How come you're so sure you wanna be a man?" countered Elrond between sniffles.

"It just... El, please, don't cry," begged Elros, scooting around to Elrond's other side. The younger twin rolled over the other way, making Elros scuttle around again. This continued three or four more times until Elros finally tackled his brother and tickled him mercilessly.

"Stop! Stop it! Stop!" Elrond swatted Elros away, trying not to laugh, but he gave in to the giggles and soon was retaliating. Both of them managed to stain the knees of their pants, as well as their palms and feet, with the green of the fresh grass. "If you go and be a man," Elrond said with more composure as he leaned against his brother, tired from their wrestling, "you'll make me cry."

Elros leaned back. "Didja'ever think that if you went and became an elf you'd make me cry?"

Pulling up blades of grass with his toes, Elrond said "I'd cry more."

"El," tried Elros in a tired yet determined voice, "I don't feel like I belong here. Elves are so... dull. They just sing and talk and think all the time. I don't think I want to do that forever."

"You could make clay pots with me," suggested Elrond. "Making clay pots is never boring."

"It isn't now," conceded Elros, "but I will get bored of it in time."

Digging his fingers into the soil, Elrond asked, "Would you get bored of me, too?"

"No, never, El," laughed Elros.

"Then you don't have to worry, because I would keep you from being bored about being an elf," concluded Elrond.

"I haven't decided yet," Elros said reassuringly, and he hugged his brother tight. "But I might. I might, and I want you to know that. And I'm happy you want to be an elf, but that might change. And I might want to be an elf later, too. But I might not. So if I do decide I want to be a man, can you promise me something?"

Elrond heaved a great sigh. "What?" he asked shakily.

"Give this to Nana," said Elros, and he turned his head and kissed Elrond's cheek. "And give this to Ada," he added, and moved Elrond's head so that he kissed his other cheek. "And if that is what happens, then just remember, that even if I'm not with you forever, that I love you forever," he said, and rubbed Elrond's nose with his, as it was their secret way of showing affection to each other. Instead of giggling like he usually did, Elrond nodded solemnly.

"But you might decide to be'n elf," Elrond said quickly.

"Oh, El," Elros said, leaning against Elrond. The pair caught sight of someone waving to them - Uncle Maglor of course, motioning for them to come inside. As they stood up, each of the twin peredhil waved to the heavens and blew kisses skyward, and then began to walk to the house. Elros stopped when he felt something tug his shirt.

"I'll keep your promise if you promise me something," Elrond said. Elros nodded and waited for Elrond to speak. "El, I'll be happy for you if you decide to be a man, but please, don't do it because some girl says so. They're yucky and they have germs and a lot of older boys do stupid things for them, and I don't want you to be one of them."

Elros stuck out his tongue and shook his head. "You have my word on that!" he agreed as they walked to the house. 


End file.
